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So if you’re consuming any mainstream media (and really, why would you?), you are probably aware of the latest contestant in everyone’s favorite game show “Is THIS The One That Kills Us All?”. Here’s a cool headline from USA TODAY a few days ago telling us “People who haven't had COVID will likely catch XBB.1.5 – and many will get reinfected, experts say” In this article by yet another in a never-ending stream of child-reporters we’re told (my bold):

“The newest COVID-19 variant is so contagious that even people who've avoided it so far are getting infected and the roughly 80% of Americans who've already been infected are likely to catch it again, experts say. ‘Essentially, everyone in the country is at risk for infection now, even if they're super careful, up to date on vaccines, or have caught it before’, said Paula Cannon, a virologist at the University of Southern California. ‘All the things that have protected you for the past couple of years, I don't think are going to protect you against this new crop of variants,’ she said.”

First of all, if “roughly 80% of Americans” have already been infected, wouldn’t that mean that “essentially everyone” had already been at risk? And what exactly are “All the things” that have “protected” us for the past couple of years if “roughly 80%” of us have already been infected? It doesn’t SEEM they worked so well. And if “All the things” that have “protected” you (but apparently didn’t) are NOW useless, whatever should we do? I still have some tuna fish, Kool-Aid, and a lifetime supply of Mad Magazines under my bed, should I crawl back into my bunker? Wait, there’s something that COULD save us all, but because I’m a selfish conspiracy kook, we’re all gonna die? Well what is it? You see, we’re chided:

But the lack of universal masking means that even people like her, who do wear masks, are vulnerable.” Wait a minute. Didn’t this “expert”JUST say “All the things that have protected you for the past couple of years, I don't think are going to protect you against this new crop of variants,”? I’m pretty sure masking would be included in “All the things” I’m pretty sure this “expert” has been “super careful”; she wears a mask and I’m sure she’s “up to date” on her vaccines, yet we’re told she “is recovering from her first case of COVID-19”. So why even mention masking? You see the subtle jab there? Because you don’t wear a mask, that “means” you’re putting really smart and caring people like this moron, I mean expert, at risk because even though she's wearing her mask to "protect" herself, her mask won't work if you're not wearing yours. You get it dumb-dumb? It's just like vaccines. HER vaccine can't work in HER body if YOU don't have a vaccine in YOUR body. It's called "science". Look it up. And your stupid unmasked face is making her universally masked face “vulnerable” you evil, science-denying bastard! This is fun, isn't it?

In case you missed that sort of subliminal "education" on masking, the child-reporter goes on: “Its growth is probably due to XBB.1.5's characteristics – it appears to bind even more tightly to receptors in the human body than its predecessors – as well as human behavior, such as traveling and not masking.” So you should now “know” you cannot be traveling and if you were a decent human being you’d be wearing your mask!! Even though the “expert” just told us resistance is futile (shout out the Borg).

But meanwhile, back in data-land:

Today's case numbers don’t LOOK like Armageddon, especially compared to last year. Official “cases” right now are hovering around 30,000 per day. At the same time last year, “cases” were around 740,000,000 a day, so I’d say we’re ahead of the game. Again, I’m no Fauci so the four basic math functions escape me, but it appears cases last year were about 25 times higher than they are now so that actually seems pretty good. Oh wait, cue the “hospitals are being overrun” stories; I’m sure they’re on the way…

You’ll also hear a lot about how contagious XBB.1.5 is. CNBC tells us “XBB.1.5 omicron subvariant is the most transmissible version of Covid yet, WHO says” And The Washington Post screams "New variant XBB.1.5 is ‘most transmissible’ yet, could fuel covid wave" Hey geniuses at WAPO, it's "COVID" not "covid". How is ANYONE taking these people seriously? In any event, apparently what you're supposed to "know" is that XBB.1.5 is marauding across the country like the Pied Piper’s rats across Lower Saxony, but let’s look at the CDC’s very own data:

Look at the purple boxes (XBB.1.5) over the last four weeks (12/17, 24, 31, 1/7). Now look at the medium greenish boxes (BQ.1.1) when THAT boogeyman was gonna kill us all for the weeks 10/29, 11/5, 12, 19. It looks to be pretty much the same exact growth rate. If I could, I’d lay the purple boxes over the green boxes to emphasize the effect of my point but I don’t know how. Sure I’m smart, but, hey, I’m not ANTHONY FAUCI smart, so back off. But in any event, big deal on the variant growth. That’s what happens when a new variant becomes king of the hill. So who cares how fast it’s taking over. Either all the things you’re doing to keep “super careful” will protect you or they won’t and you’ll catch a cold. Spoiler alert, they won’t and you probably will. By the way, for all you booster boosters out there, you will notice that BA.5 (light green), the boogeyman for which the cool new bivalent booster was designed and let loose on society just about four short months ago, is all but gone. So now all those BA.5 antibodies you forced your body to produce are wandering around looking for something to do. Cool. But lucky for you it shouldn’t be long before the “experts” tell you to line up for a new booster specifically directed at XBB.1.5 (maybe that one will be tested on 12 mice instead of only 8).

And when that time comes, and you finally question whether you should get it or not, ask yourself why NOW are you finally questioning the “experts”. Time to wake up sleepy heads.

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